doctor and lawyer

A doctor and a lawyer were attending a cocktail party when the doctor was approached by a man who asked advice on how to handle his ulcer.The doctor mumbled some medical advice, then turned to the lawyer and asked, "How do you handle the situation when you are asked for advice during a social function?""Just send a bill for such advice" replied the lawyer.On the next morning the doctor arrived at his surgery and issued the ulcer-stricken man a $50 bill. That afternoon he received a $100 bill from the lawyer.

A client who felt his legal bill was too high

A client who felt his legal bill was too high asked his lawyer to itemize costs. The statement included this item:"Was walking down the street and saw you on the other side. Walked to the corner to cross at the light, crossed the street and walked quickly to catch up with you. Got close and saw it wasn't you. -$50.00."

A lawyer was driving his big BMW

A lawyer was driving his big BMW down the highway, singing to himself, "I love my BMW, I love my BMW." Focusing on his car, not his driving, he smashed into a tree. He miraculously survived, but his car was totaled. "My BMW! My BMW!" he sobbed.A good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding! And my god, your left arm is gone!"The lawyer, horrified, screamed "My Rolex! My Rolex!"